| The Road to Charlotte New Berlin to North Carolina |
| Scanton, Pennsylvania I tried to visit Dunder Mifflin but nobody had heard of it. |
| Bass Pro Shops Every been here? Neither had I. It's like Chuck E. Cheese for people who enjoy camping and shooting stuff. |
| These folks know what I like. |
| You may ask yourself, how do you keep thugs from unloading the KX250 from the Ultimate MX Hauler at night? Here are a few ways to discourage this type of behavior:
You may also ask yourself, what if a thief decides it would be quicker to break into the Blazer and drive away with everything? Simple. There's at least 3 different fuses in the under-hood fuse box that, when removed, prevent the starter from turning. Then there's the starter relay (my personal favorite). Put any one of them in your pocket and that vehicle isn't going anywhere under its own power. And finally, if you haven't already asked yourself why you're asking yourself so many questions, you may ask why would a person lock a chain to the foot peg? After all, the only thing securing the foot pegs to the bike are steel pins that can be removed by pulling out a cotter pin. Couldn't a person pull the cotter pin and walk away with my KX250? Not exactly. On the right side peg, pulling the steel pin requires removing the rear brake pedal. Then, the clutch cover must be removed. Could it be done? Sure. Would it be done? Unlikely. This little Kawasaki quirk makes KX250 security just a bit easier. |
| I challenge anyone to find a more perfect fast food marriage. If you ask nicely, they might just deep fry your burrito. |
| Awesome deal on breasts. Throw in some oysters and you're there, man. |
| Destination #3 Lake Norman Denver, North Carolina |
| I call this image Things I Should Have Done Before Leaving But Said Naw, It'll Be OK. |
| In between the Lake Norman jet skiing and general laziness because the two guys I was supposed hang out with at a lake house couldn't make it, I checked out the new U.S. National Whitewater Center in Charlotte. It's a totally man made river with Class III & IV rapids. |
| Who knows, could be a future Olympian. |
| There's a climbing wall, too. |
| Surrounding the park is about 10 miles of mountain bike trails. |
| The dam that makes it all possible. |
| This trail was called Toilet Bowl. |
| Destination #4 Onward to Asheville |
| Setting up in the Pisgah National Forest. |
| The downside to carrying a bike on the back of a Blazer: Wet gravel roads. |
| Pilot Rock trailhead. |
| I was supposed to ride Asheville with cousin-by-marriage Jeff Murray, a mountain biking fanatic in every conceivable way. Tragically, he had to stay home and mow the lawn or something, but one of his trail suggestions was Pilot Rock. What he neglected to mention is Pilot Rock can only be ridden two ways: all uphill or all downhill. There is no in between. If you start at the bottom and a big wet cloud is literally on top of you, be prepared for pain. Every root and rock was slick. In the 3.5-mile uphill climb covering about 1600 feet, I pedaled the bike approximately 100 yards. Three guys I met riding downhill helpfully pointed out that the trail is easier to ride when you start at the top. |
| First, there was the faceplant. After 90 minutes of pushing the bike up the mountain, I took a longer route back to the bottom via Laurel Mountain. Somewhere along the way my face met the trail. |
| Then came the bees. Those little bastards live under rocks in the trail. At this spot I had to dismount and walk the bike down slippery rocks. A few bee stings later, I ran like a slow white guy in bike shoes, turned around and saw the above. Unseen in this blurry image is about 1,000 pissed-off bees swarming under my bike (and how it remained standing upright, I have no idea). The good news is bees can't see the color red in my shirt. The bad news is they see red as black, which to them means "danger". Throw in some black riding shorts and those bees saw me as one scary dude. After a few aborted attempts, I made a run for the bike, grabbed it and got the hell out of there with no further stings. |
| This pretty much sums up my day. |
| Final Stop: Lawrenceburg, Tennessee Actors make the best politicians. |
| If only smells could be digitally recreated.... |
| Epilogue: the last recreational stop on the road trip was Westpoint, Tennessee for Round #7 of the FMF National Enduro Series. It was a short race for me. About 5 miles in, my clutch cable broke. From there, I made one final stop to see a business client in Owensboro, Kentucky and then headed back home to Chicago. That, folks, is how you drive 3500 miles in 12 days. |
| Kinda eerie in them woods... |
| Securing the KX250 |
